At noon Friday, about 40 of our most dangerous citizens left their natural Caribou Coffee habitat and descended on the building that houses Congressman Kevin Cramer’s Fargo office at speeds nearing 25 mph. Their watches were not synchronized — or necessarily correct. Some were just winging it.

Mostly women, but a few men, stood as people do and occasionally flashed a pro-Planned Parenthood toward the unfortunate lost people who ended up on Feichtner Drive. We’ve all been there. Turn north at Chucky Cheese, if you care.

They were concerned about Trumpcare, which would have reduced health care services to most Americans, including women in poverty, but not to Donald Trump and Kevin Cramer. They’re both set.

Luckily, Trump and the Republican congresspeople, are inept, and the vote was canceled. It bit the dust at 3:30 EST.

Some in the ruly mob wore pink — an unoffensive shade — and a few wore those cat ear woven hats, but Cramer prefers to call them lady private parts hats, which explains a few things I don’t want to think about.

Some stood on the dormant grass, and as anyone who carped about the Cannon Ball camps knows. it will take 500 years before that patch of the lawn will recover!

“Dave’s not here.” — Tommy Chong

Amy Jacobson of Planned Parenthood and Danni Pinnick, a public health professional, walked normally — no fancy walking allowed — toward the entrance, with the intention of dropping off a petition of 800 names in support of Planned Parenthood to the congressman’s office. Just the two of them. Three large cops stopped them before they could reach the door. A scuffle did not ensue and impolite language was not exchanged.

They knew the congressman was in Washington, D.C., but wanted their voice heard on the promised deathcare vote. The bill had 17 percent support, so they knew that Cramer was unlikely to pass up the opportunity to put people’s lives in grave danger. We’ll call it a quirk.

It was the least raucous demonstration, protest or rally ever recorded and then saved on Hillary’s old server. It was on sale, OK?

Anyway, if I’m going to watch three minutes of video, there better be a bare-fist hockey fight, two dozen fluffy puppies barreling down a shiny wood floor or a goofy black bear on a hammock. Not even one racoon showed up.

Anyway, the recording was posted, and anyone could plainly see and hear that the young unthreatening ladies were turned away by policemen.

Then, as has been his habit whenever he feels a sour emotion, Congressman Cramer runs into the soft warm arms of Rob Port, his go-to media hack, to cuddle, (Port is hypoallergenic) and to complain about the people he claims to represent.

He called the video “staged” and the whole business a “stunt.”

You could hear Port nodding in agreement on his radio (cough) show. Port wrote that it was all fake news. He would know.

Did Planned Parenthood call the police station and ask for the stunt department? “Oh, yes, hi. We’re pulling a stunt on Friday — staging a demonstration. Can we rent three of your largest cops, please? Pardon me? No, we don’t need any taserings or macings. Just a regular appearance. I think it’s the No. 3 on the menu. We have a coupon.”

Or did Cramer mean that any attempt by the people to “peaceably to assemble and to petition the government for a redress of grievances” is a stunt? Who knows? He’s in the spell of the Trumpweasel, now.

From the Portweasel’s blog:

“That’s what Congressman Kevin Cramer told me today on my radio show of a Planned Parenthood protest outside his office Friday in Fargo. The protesters are now alleging that they were blocked from delivering a petition to Cramer’s staff by law enforcement, but Cramer is saying it was a “stunt.”

They WERE blocked. It’s on video. Is Port even dumber than he looks? Yes.

“First, he said nobody from Planned Parenthood called his office to make an appointment. He said a woman named Briana did call his office to inquire if it was staffed but didn’t give her full name or make an appointment to deliver the petitions.”

That’s a lie. Briana Rabenberg. North Dakota Grassroots Organizer at Planned Parenthood called and gave her full name. She didn’t call to hear heavy breathing.

And since when does anyone need an appointment to drop off an envelope? Does the post office or UPS need an invite? You can buy a frozen pizza 24/7 but don’t bother the congressman’s staff during regular business hours, even if they told you the office would be open.

“Those people had been in the building during the noon hour,” he told me (Port) adding that the “video they staged outdoors was made later.”

Lie. At least he’s learning something from his hero, Trump. “Those” people are just begging to be walled out.

From the Fargo Forum, which also employs the Port clown:

“As evidence that the video was staged, Cramer said a building owner told him that before the video was made, several of the protesters were in the building. They could have dropped off the petition then, the congressman said.”

Only one person had the envelope. Not everyone had a copy. Sheesh.

“When I (the Portweasel) asked Cramer about the police, he said “we certainly didn’t ask them to be there,” adding that it was “evidently the owner of the building.”

“He said the building owner had apparently seen media reports about the protest and informed the police that he did not want the protesters on private property. In addition to Cramer’s office the building in question houses other businesses.”

Then, Port writes a column because a radio appearance by Cramer and a blog post aren’t enough to complete the spin

“I interviewed the congressman on Monday about the situation. “(W)e certainly didn’t ask them to be there,” he said, adding that it was “evidently the owner of the building” who called the police.”

A regular citizen, who may have owned the building, or managed it, decided that he would buck a U.S. congressman and not allow two young unarmed women entry to the Congressman’s’ office.

I doubt it.

Does he, or she, ever block visitors from reaching the other tenants in the complex?

I doubt it.

Can any business call up the police and have them send over three of their finest to hold the hoard of two slight females, fierce though they be, back from a door?

I doubt it.

“Cramer said he would have had staff on hand to accept the petitions from the protesters — pretty routine stuff for members of Congress — had the they bothered to make an appointment. Instead, they showed up during the noon hour when the office was empty.”

Obviously not because they bothered. And noon is the only time many people have to visit their representative. Most people know that.

And the building manager heard about this riotous mob beforehand, but not the congressman’s staff?

I doubt it.